Getting Dirty!

Photosource: René Magritte

There are things in life that you don't quite picture yourself doing… and then on one Sunday afternoon you find your hands literally in the dirt and you stop to think to yourself:
“What happened?! What in the hell am I doing?”

I had one of these such moments this weekend when my man and I decided a major attempt at:
Gardening.

It started off with the fact that one of the plants on the stairs was bulging out her vase and needed a bigger one to grow. Then there was the issue of the bonsai that looked like a bush that had never seen a scissor in its life. Not forgetting of course the huge pot plant in the doorway that drank 5litres of water a day and was still thirsty….

Ecomarché – One stop shop for all your gardening needs. 20 minutes and 50 Euros later we were loaded with 10kg of dirt and tools to mess around in it with.

No instruction manual.

Not that we needed one, gardening is supposed to come as natural as having kids (or so they say – needless to say neither of us have the experience!).
So after unloading the car, we stared at our purchases wondering where the hell to start and came to the fast conclusion that:
“If it all fails, we’ll ask Grandma for replacements…”

I decided to take care of the indoor greens whilst my significant other took care of the outdoors… there’s just something about spiders that crawl onto the wall after the lawn has been mowed that gives me that weak knee feeling and for this reason, the grass doesn't fall under my job description…
You’d think that for the amount of the little suckers that hide under the green mat, mosquitos would be non existent in our area! But No! They squatter up rent-free in our grass as vegetarians!... Even the flies aren’t scared of them!
Hairless Tarantulas, that’s what they are!

Armed with repellent and the desire to work together, after three or so hours we came up with some pretty good results:

- We planted mint and parsley (none of which have shown signs of life – but hey it's only been a week!).
- We put more soil into all the vases, mixing it with the old and enforcing it with fertilizer (the commercial type, not the smelly one you were thinking of!)
- We transplanted one of the plants into a bigger vase and put one of her children into a new one (yes plants have kids; it’s the extension of the bigger plant). She's flowering for the first time I've ever seen but according to those that know her from small, it's her very first time flowering.
- We put the bonsai into a new pot (Yes moranguinho, I know I should’ve done it Spring but I'm just not the kind of woman that can wait nine months…) and we gave it a whole new make over! (No matter what you say – I didn't cut too much and she doesn't look bald!)
- We cut off old leaves and stems (Once again – I DID NOT cut off too much)
- And lastly, we removed the outside drunk from her vase and put her in the soil right next to the sprinkler…

So far… nothing's died.

Through the whole experience, I recall doing things the way I remembered my dad doing them. I cut the leaves the way my grandmother cut them and trimmed the Bonsai the way Código Verde had taught me not too long ago…
It wasn’t the planting, trimming and nursing of the plants that gave me the kicks, it was doing in teamwork and after a week, watching them grow…
As dad would say… with time, you’ll experience things a whole different way and you’ll understand them differently.

This doesn't explain however, my recent development of plant talking. Not only did I out of nowhere begin talking to them during the whole surgery:
“There now, once you're in the new vase you’ll feel a whole lot better…”
But a week after I continue with the habit of chatting to them as I climb the stairs:
“You're looking good! Just look at those two new leaves you've grown…”

If I start talking to any other objects, throw me in the loony bin!