Sunday, March 03, 2013

A letter to the thief of Sesimbra.

Dear Mr Thief,

You might not get to read this, but even if you don´t, I´m sure the universe will convey to you my message.
If you do by chance end up on this blog, it´s because you´ve been sifting through my life and it brought you here. You may think you know a lot about me, but i´m writing to tell you the things that you don´t.

So far, all that I know about you is that you hijacked our car, took our weekend bag, my handbag and a black paper bag with more of our belongings. You then took my debit and credit card, figured out my pin and preceded to make four withdrawels of €200 each - the limit allowed for each card. Then you went shopping with my cards and bought a computer and a tablet. You really won the lottery with this theft didn´t you? Because in addition to your purchases you found my brand new tablet and two cellphone´s in my bag. You also found my husband´s flash and a jewellery box filled with precious things that i´m sure you´ve already sold or gave away to some foolish whore who knows you for the scoundrel that you are.
You must be pretty proud of yourself aren´t you? You outsmarted me and got away with it... or at least that´s what you must think.

This much you know... let me fill in the blanks about what you don´t know...

To you it may be irrevelant to why we went to the castle of Sesimbra, but to Luis and I it was supposed to be one of the landmarks that would stay in our memory of our third year anniversary.
That´s why you found my jewellery box in our weekend bag... I took it so that I could use the stones Luis bought me on our honeymoon to Mexico. That silver lace ring that you found was my engagement ring, the one he presented me with when he truly surprised me by asking me to be his wife.
The silver bracelet was given to me by my grandmother when we left for South Africa and the circle earings and matching necklace was given to me when my daughter was born.

Aren´t you lucky to have found two cellphones, one with the plastic still on it. You see, i´d just received the Samsung Galaxy SII LTE the previous day after waiting for over two weeks for it to arrive. I even went to work on purpose just to be able to take it with me, I hadn´t even chosen a ringtone to put on it yet. But my biggest lost was in fact the old Nokia N70 you found; I´m sure the worn cover must´ve upset you as it will bring down the price you will ask for it. You must´ve formatted it by now, so let me remind you what was on it: four years worth of photos i´ll never get back, one with my aunt Marlene that is no longer with us. That bubbly sound you heard as it receives a message is the sound of my daughter laughing at five months. The electronic device that I will mostly miss is my tablet, did you find the photo of my husband and daughter behind it? I´m sure you did, you won´t dare sell it with the purple cover I had. My daughter loved my tablet as much I did, that´s where she saw all her music video´s - her favourite is "I´m a gummy bear". Did you take a look at the home videos I had on it? The one´s of Lara laughing and playing. There´s one where she wishes her grandmother a happy birthday, and another where she strokes Kalash. My favourite is the one that she calls me "mama" for the very first time.

I immediately went into shock when I realised all these things were gone. For the three hours that we waited at the GNR in Sesimbra to do something, I cried non-stop. I kept waiting to wake up from what to me seemed the worst nightmare possible. I would´ve rather lived in a real life "walking dead" movie than face the reality that you stole those things from me.  I took the pills to calm me down but I kept reliving the nightmare in my head. Taking my handbag was like stealing my identity, I kept seeing your grimey fingers going through my things, seeing pictures of my loved ones and feeling completely impotent and unable to do anything about it. What did you think about when you opened my purse and saw the photo and Luis and I when we got married? The photo of my brother or my niece´s first pre-school photo? That´s when the hatred began. I hated you so much. All I could focus on is you being caught, I wanted your identity more than anything and if destiny should put you in my path I would cut one of your fingers, or a whole hand... make no mistake that I would´ve made you suffer a very physical and and painfull consequence to what you did to me. Because what you did broke me... into more pieces that I can put back together and I will forever have that image imprinted on the new identity card and driver´s licence that I had to request the next day.

Before I reveal to you the reason of my writing to you, let me fill in just a few more blanks... that sexy nightwear that you found - I wore that on my wedding night, unfortunetely for you, the details of that evening are more than you deserve. Those boots that were in the paper bag, I wore them on one of the most amazing Christmas party´s I ever had. The perfume bottle you found, was given to me by one of my very best friends (Thanks Quich) and the trip you found is for my uncle´s wedding in June.

For the last couple of days i´ve hated you more than anyone i´ve ever hated in my life. I kept hoping the phone would ring to tell us they´ve caught you and that you will never be able to put anyone else through what you put us through. Each new thing I remember that is now in your possession makes me wish a thunderbolt would strike you down as you leave the house and that it leaves you in hours of pain before you do the world a favour and just die.
Don´t you feel loved?

The reason i´m writing to you, is to tell you that i´m no longer angry.
You see, to continue to be angry with you would mean that you would still hold importance to me and you certainly don´t deserve as much.
You may have destroyed our savings but all you have taken is money. I still have my husband, I still have my daughter and I still have today, tomorrow and a whole future to make more wonderful memories.
I´m going to work to recover all that I lost and each morning when I get up i´ll look in the mirror with pride, because I know I earned every cent that I have.
Can you do that? Does it make feel superior that you survive on other people´s misery?
You´re nothing but scum.
You can´t steal my memories, you can´t steal my future and you can´t steal my hope.
My locks have been changed, and slowly i´ll piece my life together... this is where our story ends.

Take a good look at my family... those smiling faces that look back at you, are mine.
They´ll never be yours... that happiness and joy you find in my things - you will never have.
I know this, because the universe only gives to us what we give to it - you will never be happy regardless of how much money and things you steal from other people, you will continue to be a miserable wreck all of your life with no one to love you and everyone hating you for the scoundrel that you are.
Make no mistake, I will do whatever is in my power in aiding the authorities so that you are caught but from this night on I won´t give you a second thought... you are worthless and I will no longer let you polute my mind.
Thank-you for reminding me of how loved I am and how lucky I am to be employed, to have a home and a life filled with people that love and care about me.
I may have become a little wiser and more careful in the future but I will not give up the hope and love in my heart because of what you did.
I wish nothing more for you, than for you to receive everything you deserve.

Love Always,
Your ex-victim