Friday, August 27, 2004

The Wedding Song.

This morning when opening my e-mail, I was faced with a challenge. A good friend of mine sent me the lyrics to a song titled “Don’t marry her, fuck me”. Along with these lyrics was a challenge to write a blog on the subject. Frustrated, my answer was simply to reply that I try no to be judgemental and accept people for who they are and the choices they make. However, I reckon that a man who cheats on his wife/girlfriend is a coward who doesn’t have the balls to make a commitment to one woman and will forever be looking over his neighbours fence… if he’s unhappy well tough shit, let him find the courage to grow up and be happy. A woman, who is in a relationship/marriage, knows she’s being cheated on and accepts it, gets the same kind of sympathy from me as the man who’s cheating on her. If you don’t have the courage to get out, move on and be happy, then you’ve only got yourself to blame for the misery. Lastly, as for the third corner of a triangle, I don’t consider these women whores or sluts, I simply think that a woman who is satisfied with only half a man also gets exactly what she wants.

I’ve never known a love story that wasn’t complicated! Yes, there are relationships that don’t work out and marriages that fall apart but for God’s sake! Let the one you hold be the one you want!

There was a corny song playing on the radio this afternoon, the lyrics went something like “Life is so different from your dreams”.

Of course it is! In your dreams you control every action and reaction… in reality, everyone follows their own cue. You can’t control nor predict other peoples feelings and reactions, and there will be times when opinions and plans will clash. But that’s where communication comes in! People then talk and explain their intentions. Understanding then takes place and your discover that love is an eternal feeling! Love isn’t all about getting. It isn’t all about what he/she can do for you… have you ever asked yourself what you can do for him?

I’ve lost count of the relationships that have been saved with the little things in life! I’m not just talking about those surprise handcuffs and whipped cream… I’m talking about calling him up just to tell him you thought of him, maybe surprise him with an ice cream. Kidnap him for a day… plan a picnic… cook him a special dinner… watch of his favourite movies… even a night bowling has magic in it! These aren’t considered sacrifices when you do it with love and an open heart. It’s that tiny kiss in the morning that makes the day start off well, or the smile just before driving off, even the teenager wise enough to give his seat in the bus for his girlfriend is capable of winning her over with such a gesture. Personally I miss having someone to massage, to whisper to and to write columns about.

But this is what this column is really about, the song the wedding singer sang to his woman:

I wanna make you smile, whenever you’re sad

Carry you around when your arthritis is bad,

Oh all I want to do is grow old with you

I’ll get your medicine when your tummy aches,

Build you a fire if the furnace breaks

Oh it could be so nice, growing old with you.

I’ll miss you, kiss you,

Give you my coat when you are cold

Need you, Feed you

And even let you hold the remote control

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink

Put you to bed when you’ve had too much to drink

Oh I could be the man, to grow old with you.

I want to grow old with you.

There is no conclusion to this entry. Instead, I’ve decided to comment to my own words in a song from my new cd:

Eamon – Fuck, I don’t want you back. (The explicit version)

See I don’t know why I liked you so much,

I gave you all of my trust

I told you, I loved you.

Now that’s all down the drain

You put me through pain

I want you to let you know how I feel:


Fuck what I said, it don’t mean shit now

Fuck your presents, you might as well throw them out,

Fuck all those kisses, they didn’t mean jack,

Fuck you, you ´ho, I don’t want you back (X2)

You thought, you could keep this shit from me

You burn bitch, I heard the story

You played me, you even gave him head

Now you’re asking for me back

You’re just another hag

Look elsewhere, ´coz you’re done with me


You question, if I care

You could ask anyone,

I even said you were my great one

Now it’s over, but I do mean it upset

It hurts real bad I can’t take swear it back

because I loved that ho

(Chorus) until fade.

Bitter? Nah… it’s just the song playing in my head. Besides, it’s not what he’s saying that touches me, but the way he says it. The question really lies in: What will you be singing at your wedding? Or better yet… what is the song being played in your relationship at this moment? Are you still drugged on a Celine Dion melody or lately have you caught yourself humming “I want to break free”. Perhaps you need to change the music channel. Hopefully we’ll all be more careful with the music we choose to listen to in future.

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