Thursday, August 10, 2006

Searching for Experience

She complained about the relationship that had stood the test of time. Together since they were fifteen years old, she lamented the fact that she hadn't experienced other men, other relationships…

She needed a wake up call!!!!!

If a woman experiences one relationship instead of ten, it's less nine times that she got her heart broken.
Less nine times she got betrayed.
Less nine time that she lost her faith and trust in love.
Less nine times that she had to pull herself up from the darkness.
Less nine bags of trash she needed to clean out before entering in a new relationship…

If a woman has the luck of having one long term and wakes up to the same face each morning then…
She has the privilege of experiencing all first hand moments with the same face…
The privilege of recalling those moments with the same face…
The privileges of recognizing every angle and every change on that face…
The privilege of finding that face with her eyes closed
The privilege of that face knowing and loving hers for who and what she is.

If a woman is in a relationship based on trust that allows her the freedom to have a big group of both female and male friends then…
She learns the bad experiences from others rather than hurting herself…
She gets to know her male friends at their most intimate without having to involve herself in a relationship with them…
She can relate at different levels with her different friends.
She get enough life experience from those around her to appreciate her man.

Love,
Trust,
Not to be taken lightly nor found at every corner nor built within mere days. What she has most women never find. That is experience!

My friend sat on a wall with me clearly free from doubt and the desire to embrace and appreciate her man clearly shone on her face.

First hand experience is overrated… because doing it all doesn't necessarily mean that you feel it all, live it all and figure it all out.
It's important to try new things, but it's even more important to know what you got and know what it is that you should hold on to.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

This piece made me stop and think. Without a doubt you have a point even though I still defend the fact that people need to learn by trying things out for themselves. Just goes to show that everyone is different and what is good for the goose may not be good for the gander.

Anonymous said...

Como pode ter ela a certeza k e com ele k ela ker ficar se nunca teve mais ninguem na vida??

Quicha said...

I agree. You don't need to have a million guys in and out your life to finally appreciate one guy. I don't think having a lot of relationships directly means in the end you'll know when the right guys shows up and appreciate him, it means that you've lived a bunch of experiences with a bunch of different guys, which isn't always a bad thing. With each of those guys you might think "this is the one", but in the end you realize it isn't, so why not give it a try anyway? You never know if the next one will be HIM. How can you be sure if this is the one if you haven't had others? If you are sure of what you feel, if you are sure you love the guy and most importantly, if you make eachother happy, isn't that enough? I've had two other relationships in my life that marked me, this third one is the most important, I'm not going to now think that I shouldn't settle down because I haven't had enough relationships with men and that I need to experience more, nonsence! The other two could have been "the one", but they weren't. So what?! I got something out of it and I moved on, not because I wanted to experience more guys, but because they just weren't meant to be...
It is also true that you should learn from other's mistakes, we can't live and learn from all the experiences of the world, sometimes we need to follow the examples of people around us, even though when we go through what some people go through we will react differently and feel first hand what it is, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't take other's experiences as an example for us to follow.
Bla bla bla :-P