Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Midnight Walk

Photosource: Alfred Stieglitz

I recently told someone that when the sun stops shining he should dance in the rain.
The sun can't shine all the time…
Neither will the grey clouds last out forever.
Little did I know that only hours afterwards, I'd be taking my own advice.

I can't sleep.
My mind plagues me with the thoughts I avoid within dreams I can't control.
Dreams too real… too intense…
The exhausting kind.
And so I avoid closing my eyes
I avoid the place where I lay my head down to sleep
And when the time comes to climb up the stairs onto the second floor… I pump up the volume on my Ipod and we take each other for the midnight walk.

My midnight walks have become a nightly routine.
I love Lisbon at midnight…
She's like a mother that embraces her children at a vulnerable hour;
She protects the prostitute on the corner,
Kisses goodbye the faithful from the church after late mass,
She accompanies the old man walking his Great Dane…
Listens attentively to the two students discussing the abortion referendum underneath the pale light from the lamppost.
She watches the foreigner…
Walking past the gas station with the orange fluorescent lights;
The nursery school with the empty swings;
The church with the cold cement;
Macdonalds… There just seems to be one everywhere!

I contemplated my successes of the day:
Today I made someone smile…
Today I made someone laugh…
Today I made someone feel special…
Today I restored someone's faith in themselves…
I told my little brother that I loved him… I told my dad the same and sent my mom a message telling her I miss her.
Today I hugged a friend…

Tonight… I can't sleep.

Time to go… home.
With my Ipod on my left and time on my right, I turned towards the place I'd once again spend the night tossing and turning…
That's when I felt it…
It wasn't rain…
It wasn't drizzle…
It was the delicate touch of dew…
On my face, in my hair… on my lips…
Like a gentle kiss from the heavens…
The kind that causes that tingling feeling of absolute satisfaction.
Taking a deep breath and my sweet time down the road;
I once again realized that I'm exactly where I'm meant to be.

Wet and content;
I lay my head down to a peaceful sleep that lasted through to the morning.

16 comments:

Lauxinha said...

loved it

=)

beijinho

Moralles said...

Sometimes at night, it's when it becomes more difficult and harder to understand where we standing, where to go. Even harder is to choose between why and why not.

Late night walks are great to set the mind into place.

Love the way you put your words.

Storm said...

With all the "other" things you can do at midnight what are you doing walking around town in the rain?
Just admit that your not happy and come home Cinderella.

Merchi said...

"... the sunshine in my soul is here to tell you that pain doesn´t have to last. The love that´s in my heart is here to pray that pain will go away."

Sunshine said...

Lauxinha: Thanks, you´re welcome anytime.

Moralles: The night is yours alone... the time where there´s no task in waiting and that your only responsibility is to listen to your own needs... that´s what makes it so hard.
Why and Why Not... a most sincerely difficult choice. :)
Late night walks help put some ideas into perspective... I recomend it to anyone that owns pepper spray! ;)
Thank-You for your visit here... you´re always welcome! :)

Storm: ...such as? ;)
Quit teasing, we both know i´m exactly where i´m meant to be! Thank-You for missing me though, I miss you too.

Merchi: Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional... I don´t wallow on the unnecessary but I thank-you nonetheless for the prayer that chases away the hurt. A kiss to your heart.

Liilavati said...

Querida...Desejo que te dediques a ti mesma tanto quanto te dedicas aos outros...
Beijinhos e um dia feliz

Sunshine said...

Liilavati: Primocas se visses o tamanho do chocolate que comprei para ser o meu Valentine!!!... Também sei dedicar-me a mim nos momentos certos! hehehe

Liilavati said...

lololol Bem pensado!
Beijinhos

Saldanha said...

O que importa é ir...não para aqui ou para ali...ir simplesmente, ir...
destino é o acordar dia após dia, e saber que estás entre os vivos...
aproveita cada momento,com se fosse o ultimo, dificilmente se repetem...
bj

Lord of Erewhon said...

Gloomy! :)=

P. S. Sunshine... tu não andas bem... Agora beijas corações?... aquela coisa de carne ensanguentada dos filmes de horror?!? :)=
Se deres em gótica não envies um telegrama para África a culpar-me!
JAJAJAJAJA!!!

Dark kiss.

Lord of Erewhon said...

Mete esta no ipod para quando saíres em Lisboa à meia-noite: http://www.coldmeat.se/sounds/audio/cophnia/cophnia_sanctus.mp3

Eu depois apareço de entre as árvores e mordo-te o pescoço todo! ROTFL!!! :)=
JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA!!!

Lord of Erewhon said...

Coph Nia, «Sanctus»

pater et mater unus deus. mater et filius unus deus. filius et filia unus deus. filia et pater unus deus. omnia in duos: duo in unum: unus in nihil: haec nec quatuor nec omnia nec duo nec unus nec nihil sunt. gloria patri et matri et filio et filiae et spiritui sancto externo et spiritui sancto interno ut erat est erit in saecula saeculorum sex in uno per nomen septem in uno ararita.

Espero que consigas perceber a ironia negra e a perversidade herética da letra! :)

Sunshine said...

Saldanha: O importante é aproveitar o momento e não ficar parada... Obrigada pelas palavras sábias.

Lord of Erewhon: I thought you liked the gloomy...
Dá para ver que nunca ninguem te beijou no coração... que não seja por isso amigo! Um beijo no teu coração também... agora isso de eu passar para gótica, até que o preto me favorece mas não prescindo do azul e do cor de rosa e do branco também por isso esquece...
Não sei bem se essa música vai ficar bem entre Sonique e Roxette, além do facto de eu não perceber latim... vais ter que arranjar uma música mais romántica para eu ouvir!
Agora isso já de me morderes o pescoço... promises promises! :P

fieryfairy said...

your opening line is simply brilliant

and now i love Losbon at midnight too xx

Sunshine said...

Which means you really ought to put Lisbon on your map... I promise a girl´s night out when you decide to visit! ;)

Klatuu o embuçado said...

:)=