Sunday, May 21, 2006
As the other four women sat down before her, she wondered again why she was bothering to once again call a meeting on the subject. She should know by now that each of them had a very distinct and different opinion from each other. They were too individual and dogmatic about their beliefs to come to any kind of consensus on the subject, and yet they relied on each other for their collective success.
As usual, Kat spoke first, voicing the doubts that each of them were privately thinking over.
“I don’t know why we bother to discuss this topic. It’s not like we’re going to come to any agreement.”
“We need to Kat, otherwise it’s going to cause conflict between us” justified Katherine.
“I don’t see why we have to come to a conclusion though. It’s not like we’re at a stage where we need to make any concrete decision! Here we all are stressing and in the meantime the guy we’re supposed to giving all this attention to might not be him, we probably haven’t even met him yet!”
“I happen to think that he’s the one! Am I the only one paying attention to the signs? The nervous affect when he’s around? The undying urge to reach out and touch him and how about that blank effect as a result from looking into those gorgeous blue eyes!...”
Katie sighed as she lost herself in her own imagination
“We have to think up ways to get closer to him!”
The four women turned their eyes on Katie with incredulous amazement. Tension began to mount until Katherine finally broke the silence.
“And that ladies, is exactly what we’re all here to avoid!”
“Speak for yourself honey! I’m willing to discover how deep this rabbit hole goes…”
“And once again get us all stuck in it!” Interrupted Kat with the look that reminded them all of the painful consequences of risks gone wrong.
Kay wasn’t one to back down so staring Kat straight in the eyes, crisply responding:
“Risks are a part of the reason that has gotten us this far!”
There was no arguing that! Kasey put her hands to her head, predicting another long night of heated exchanges and was relieved when Katherine finally brought things to some kind of order. Katherine was the intelligent one of the five. Patient, reliable and organized; if there were a head of the group it would be her as she was the one that somehow always managed to put all the pieces together to form a whole.
“Alright ladies, if we continue this way we’ll never come to an understanding! So I suggest we all have our uninterrupted turn to share our thoughts about this man and then we can debate solutions”
Silence announced their first and only agreement on the subject on the subject.
“Good. In that case I’ll begin by stating that the facts speak for themselves. He is a fellow colleague, a teammate… one which we have to relate to on a professional level. To get involved personally would be complicating things. Not only would public relations be challenged but we’d risk the atmosphere of our working environment. Think of the quality of our work diminishing with the loss of concentration and then there’s the scrutiny and criticism from our other fellow colleagues. We’ve worked too hard to put our careers under this kind of risk. We’re still recovering from the damages caused by the last failure endured. We’re in no condition to suffer any more emotional setbacks considering the investment we’ve planned for the next two years. I propose that we cut conversation to a minimum and we ignore his existence to avoid the development of deeper emotional bonds.”
“Just like that huh?! Why do you always forget that what makes us who we are is based on the fact that we’re not afraid to do and live things differently! Since when did we decide to back down from a challenge?!”
Kay’s passionate outburst was more than expected.
“Why shouldn’t we embark on this journey? Who can say for sure that you know where it ends? Unlike the two previous failures, this one has real potential! He’s single, mature, knows what he wants and goes for it. His life appears to contain stability and yet he finds ways to travel, enjoy himself and try new things. Kasey, I know you’re feeling me on this one girl! In fact, he’s captivated you all with his communication skills and general knowledge and who can deny his incredible sense of humor? The experience alone is worth putting our hearts on the line! Haven’t we always said that we regret more the things we don’t do than those we try? Aren’t you curious to see how he could fit in our lives? Do I have to remind you all how sexy his eyes, smile and oh-so-round ass is?”
There were giggles with the smiles but Kat was the one person that didn’t find the last remark funny.
“The world is full of ass Kay; if that was the objective we could easily set our sights on someone less risky and sexier in that department. His ass isn’t part of the attributes the rest of us want to invest in. May I remind you that those sexy eyes were looking in another direction that isn’t ours? Perhaps you’ve forgotten that those sexy lips are whispering sweet nothings into someone else’s ears and given the chance, his investment would clearly be that person!"
“Hey! Let’s not forget that she’s committed to someone else and for the record, I happen to like her very much!” cried Katie adamantly
“We all do! That isn’t in question here; however it doesn’t change the fact that his eyes are turned towards her and not towards us. On comparison, we don’t stand a chance of competing with her. I say we back off and cut our losses.”
Everyone was startled by Katie’s outburst.
“I will not let all of you give up on what we’ve all been dreaming of! Have you all forgotten how badly we’ve all wanted someone like him to come into our lives! I know you’ve all looked into the depths of his soul when he looks at us, felt the heat in his touch and the warmth in his voice. He even knows our home as if it were his own. Can’t you picture yourselves waking up with him? Being pulled into his embrace? I know you’ve all imagined what his kiss is like! Why are you all denying your instincts?! I say we own up to our feelings and let him know his attentions are welcome. I don’t want to have to survive another lost opportunity!”
With this, Katie’s bottom lip began to tremble and even Kat who normally bitched about such sappy emotions was clearly moved. Putting her arm around Katie, she knew that Katie was the one that suffered the most with each passing failure and she squeezed her tight in attempt to comfort the girl.
“Don’t worry Katie, you always say that there’s no cheating Fate… what is meant to be will happen and nothing that we decide here today will change that.”
“Once again this talk has gotten us nowhere” remarked Katherine with an exasperated sigh.
“Not all of us have shared our opinions though. For the person mostly preoccupied with setting up this discussion, you’re the one that’s least contributed!” accused Kay.
Instantly all eyes were on Kasey who wet her lips, visibly nervous on sharing her views.
“That’s probably because I don’t have an opinion… I mean I do – about him in any case. Unlike all of you, I’m just not sure what to do about it. At first I agreed with Katherine and Kat, figuring that perhaps we could postpone such emotions for next year and hopefully for someone else. I’m not saying that what we feel is intense, nor do I consider the feelings towards him circumstantial. All I know for sure is that we all enjoy his presence and I often find myself hoping he’ll talk to us. I can’t resist trying to make him smile and despite the consequences, I find myself hoping to get to know him better.”
“What do you suggest?” Kat said, getting to the point.
“I don’t, I mean I do… The fact is that we’re never going to come to an agreement this way so we’re just going to have to wait for more facts in order to decide. To get this right, we shouldn’t back off nor should we get to close. We’re gonna have to go with the flow. I suppose what I’m trying to say is that we should just wait and see what happens”
“Kasey has a point. It’s the best temporary plan of action until something happens to tip the scales”
And with that, the meeting was postponed for sometime in an unknown future.
Kasey wondered which of the five he would like best. He saw more of Katie and Katherine than any of the others. He might have even gotten a glimpse of Kat on days she was busy defending some or other cause and Kay wasn’t around at the time and places that he was usually at. She wondered if he’d even ever seen her or noticed her existence. She didn’t exactly stand out in the crowd and often she felt overpowered by the strong personality of the other four. She often questioned her place within the five. Katherine was the intelligent and Cultural one who took care of business; Kay was courageous one who could be depended on to embark on any adventure; Katie the innocent, loving and very giving one who cares about everyone and Kat is the one that fights and defends all the causes. And she Kasey, is the fifth element that doesn´t stick out by any special gift. It had been Kasey that formed the alliance in the first place, joining them with the same collective purpose that drove them all: Love.
Climbing exhausted into bed, Kasey knew one thing for sure “If it isn’t him, then it’s someone else but he’s out there waiting for them”
She smiled as she grasped her purpose in the group – she was there to keep the faith.